Independence Day

        On Aug 31st 1957, Malaya/Malaysia was born. It was a day of celebration, and people all around the country were out in the streets celebrating. Some were wearing their patriotic gear, and some were just having a good time. 

      In the back of a small cafe, a couple of people were sitting drinking and talking. One of the people was a bit older than the other, and he had a bit of an air about him. The older man said to the younger man, "I think it's time we started to think about what we want for Independence Day." The younger man looked up at him with wide eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked. "I mean, we've been living in this country ever since independence, and we've never really thought about what we want for ourselves," the older man said. "I think it's time we started to think about what we want for the country we're going to be living in for the rest of our lives." The young man was hesitant at first, but then he thought about it some more. 

     He realized that he wanted to be a part of a great country, and he wanted to be able to do things that were only possible in Malaysia. He agreed to the older man's plan, and they started to think about what they wanted for Independence Day. They came up with a lot of different ideas, and they all seemed to be great. But they didn't know how to make it happen. They didn't know how to get the government to do what they wanted. But they knew that they had to keep going because they knew that if they stopped, everything would be lost.

    We continue to fight for freedom today, even as our government continues to weaken our liberties. We must never forget what it means to be free—to be able to do what we want when we want, and with whom we want. And we must never forget the sacrifices made by our ancestors, who fought and died so that we could have this day.

    What do we really want for our independent nation? Is it to build our nation back on the right path morally and economically? I dream of this nation one day being free of corruption and malpractices. Improving our school education system as top 10 best education in the world. To produce a brave generation of thinkers and doers that will carry on the torch of the straight path, caringness, high integrity, well mannered and spreading great kindness in society. Lastly to clean up our lack of belief and faith towards the All Mighty one. The AllMighty is the King. So what's your dream for this beloved country? And how do you plan to make it happen? Would love to hear your comments.

Looking for a job

I lost my job in the year 2016 due to VSS exercise at the age of 40. I have been working for the company for the past 12 years with the expectation of retiring from the company. It was a better company to work for comparing my previous companies. Getting VSS was not in my preparation for life change. Never had the idea that I will lose my job 1 day. Around 400 of us got the package that time.  I thought by always delivering my work as good as I can and loyalty was still the thing ... but unfortunately I was naive with a lot of things at that time.  For the last 12 years I never had the plans of changing a company, updating my resume or going for an interview, therefore the last 12 years I was out of touch with what recent things people do and prepare for their CVs and interviews. I should have updated and brushed up on my cv and interviews every couple of years. At least my interviewing skills will not be out of touch if I did that. That was a big mistake I learned after I left the company

With 15 years of total working experience, I thought to myself that shouldn't be a problem of getting a job since I have many years of it compared to my fresh grad days..... Another naive type of mindset I had also. The reality for me was having a lot more experience was more difficult to find a job compared to my fresh grad days. I got my 1st job after 2 months of grad and that was during an economic downturn, however, for myself having 15 years of total experience, would involve more than 2 months to get a new job. The logic behind this was that when you are more experienced, the salary scale was rather difficult to fit you compare to a fresh grad, and apart from that don't apply for the entry-level type of job, because it will be wasting your time. They would prefer to have some fresh grad to do it and pay low for that and it will not be logical to pay a very high experience person even though you asked for a low pay job to survive. In that job market world, everyone has their own place. You just have to ask about your "place". 

The metaphysics part about looking for a job is that, when it's not your time, it's not, and when it is your time, it is and it has been decided by Allah your sustenance time. You will not take other people's sustenance nor other people will take yours and sometimes you will be wondering how come I got this job so easy when at the beginning you think you were not fit for it. The answer because it's been decided upon it is yours. Yes, you still need to work hard to look for it but do not dwell on it or be angry about it if you cannot get it because when the time comes for you to have it, no one else could take that away from you. Sometimes you are being detoured to get to something better, brushing up with many interviewing skills and finally that day will come for you to have it. Just be patient about it and trust that Allah will do His job for you. He never leaves your sustenance empty since the 1st day in your mother's womb and nor will He until your sustenance expiry date comes and that's where the day you leave this worldly life. 

My lesson learnt from this whole thing is everything is temporary, and I shouldn't have the mindset that at the beginning it will be permanent. Even though they so call tell you it's a permanent job. There is nothing permanent in this world. It's temporary because all of us is on a journey and we were just stopping by at certain milestone to get a rest, learnt from people,  help people and be kind to people and then move on again until our journey end. "45 years went by like a smoke into a keyhole" -from the movie The Bucketlist, and yes that's fast how life went by especially in the last 20 years. Another thing, if you feel lonely, crying alone and feel like going into moody circumstances once in a while, get help as fast as you could. Don't take mental health lightly because it is part of our health and it's the most important part because what we think determined our actions and attracts the universal law. We are what we thinketh. Visiting a psychologist or psychiatrist doesn't mean we are crazy, it means we are responsible people to take our health concerns seriously. 

The key question to all of this experience... Is there still a loyalty value in the corporate world nowadays? Everyone has their own interpretation .... what does loyalty exactly mean???.... 

Taking care of elderly folk

 It has been a long time I have not written here. Just waiting for too many things to happen in life then only will continue to write it. So this time around would want to share my experience being a caretaker for my late father. My father passed away in Nov 2017. My father started to get deeply ill in Oct 2016... He was admitted to the hospital for nearly a month and Dr found out that his kidney was failing. Well, he had a history of diabetes for nearly 40years... He started his insulin at the age of 30s.... and at the age of 70s, the kidney started to fail due to his diabetes... The fact that his heart was not strong, he was unable to do the blood hemodialysis. So another way that was to be mild dialysis was using water.. and that's called peritoneal dialysis. That was the first time in my 40 years of age... I heard there was such a thing. However, caring for a peritoneal dialysis patient was even stringent. Will need to have a very clean and dedicated room just for the patient at home. I was trained how to wash my hands properly and do all the peritoneal procedure for my father by the nurses.  Well knowing how to wash hands properly.. kind of good knowledge acquired since now is covid time. 

Apart from his dialysis routine, my late father lost both of his legs (a few years before) due to diabetes also, therefore it was challenging to take care of someone that was bedridden and at the same time, his emotions were unstable.  I took care of him for an estimation of around 1 year and within that 1 year also I had lost my weight tremendously. Truthfully as a caretaker one thing that you will be forced to have was the attitude of patientness because it was not easy. 1 thing that I dislike and noticed was that whenever people came by visited my father, then telling me to be patient.... Come on... if you never been a caretaker, you will not understand and you think by telling to a caretaker to be patient was something so wonderful to be mentioned???? To me was NOT. The whole 1 year if I ever heard people came by and uttered the word patient.. I was so despised of the word. And I knew that person never been a caretaker before and don't understand. 

One of the challenging parts as a caretaker was that you will be facing a lot of illogical demands from your patient. And me being a Muslim even heavier the responsibilities because it's already stated in the Quran to treat your old age parents well..... It was not easy. Around that time also I faced a depression status that I was not even aware I had until my father passed away. So my only way to face all those illogical demands was to surrender to everything. In the beginning, it was a lot of argument and temperamental scenes, but eventually, it hit on my mind and heart, why should I quarrel with a person that might be his last day today or tomorrow, and I started to surrender everything, and told myself that let his heart be happy of whatever he wanted until his last breath and I  glad that I made the decision. There was nothing remorseful or regret of something I never fulfilled for him until his last day. 

To my Muslim brothers and sisters, Jannah is not cheap, and taking care of your old folks when they are in a healthy state is not a trial actually. That is easy. Just giving money to them when they are ill also easy.  The trial came when they are not in their normal state and when your siblings keep pushing who will take care of your parents. That is the time.... so grab the opportunity as means for your ticket to Jannah and you will need to sacrifice the other part of your normal life to get the ticket. Few years, I sacrificed my opportunity to look for a job because I wanted the ticket, but then whether or not the ticket will be valid to enter Jannah only in the hereafter I will know. The only thing I knew I did try to get the ticket, but if you do not even try, then ask yourself what's actually important??? I'm not telling this as a proud thing of what I did, it was never a proud thing but with the intent to tell all of you try to grab that ticket when the opportunity is there even when you felt it was impossible to do it. Sincere believe that Allah will help you during the impossible time and He will reveal to you that He will definitely. 

Loosing a Job

It's 2016 - My last day at work in one of the big oil and gas company in the world. It was a corporate downsized decision and it affected almost 400 of us in the company. Being there for almost 12 years, made me realised at that point of time that in this age, job security and job loyalty are something in the past... The past that goes way back in my parent's time. It's the information age, its the Internet age, in which everything has made big changes, in which that principle never applied anymore.

How good am I or how superb am I in my work at that place of work before, it isn't a guarantee anymore that I would be given the opportunity to stay longer in that place. Just because, there is some other part of the world is cheaper than my currency and that all makes the difference of business judgement or decision. Yup, the fact is we were just pawn that was selected to be sacrificed. There were some pawns that were not selected, well good for them that they were being shielded by the bishop, or the queen or the knights. In my Malay language, we said... "Udahler to rezeki depa... tak yah nak dipersoalkan".. in which translated that "just don't dwell on things that beyond our control, because it was not our sustenance rights" Yup... All of this also happened because of the Qadar of Al-Mighty. He decided which is my next sustenance to be. InnalihiWainnahirajiun..."From Him, we came, and to Him, we return"... 

It was my first experience that I have to go through the emotional ride of losing the job. It's not easy, but just be prepared, the feeling isn't really nice at all. Well, I was very much naive at that point of time thinking that well, it shouldn't be tough to look for other jobs because I have so many experiences compare that I was just a fresh graduate many years ago with no experiences at all. But then all is just pure believe of a naive person... With my age of 40 and with that many experiences, doesn't mean it is easy.... to continue this part in my blog topic of "Looking for a job"... 

So as I continued struggling to look for a job... my next challenge was in waiting actually.... that was my father terribly fell ill.... to continue in "Looking after an elderly folk" topic. 

The biggest lessons I learned was that after I lose a job was to aware that:

1)Life will just turn u upside down in a split second. I thought that I could retire in the company and have all the career plans in the company. Nope... that was not the case. There are other better plans the Al-Mighty has for me. Believe in that which makes my heart at peace. 

2)Work is just a means to bring sustenance to you and your family. Work does not define us. Family and good friends are much more important when we are going through the good and the bad times. It's better to build that good relationship when we are still working and how bad or busy we are with our work, we should not forget our family and good friends. Make time for them and be with them when their time in need because there will be our time of need one-day too.

3)Change is constant as how the way we need to prepare our work now. Be able to be adaptable, flexible, and change on how we approach things in which many things are new way currently. Be prepared to expose to the next important skills and education for our next level of experiences. Perhaps, we were detoured to something that meant for us to be a better person. Trust that process. In this life, we are been given for something that we need not something that we want.. The needs that meant for us to fulfil the purpose of our life here before our expiry date comes. 

4)Always prepare for the future and be frugal for the hardship later, based on Surah Yusuf verse 43-49. The Al-Mighty would not reveal the story of it if He does not want us to get the lesson from it. 

5)Believe and Trust the Al-Mighty. The zikir... 

So many things to catch up...

It has been a long time that I have not written in my blog here, I guess it because I didn't find the time or make the time for it. So many stories that I would love to share based on my experiences the last 3years... The last 3 years I have turned 40... yup the 4 series... in which the time that our beloved Prophet got the divine message, the beginning of all the trials that is out of his mind I believe. I think that's why the reason we were exposed to that age. Yeah, I got my out of mind trials beginning of 40. That's why some people said.. life begins at 40... or midlife crisis begins... Too many things started to come into our life that we could never imagine before around that time I guess. 

Not all people are the same, perhaps some people having it while younger and some older... But for me yeah the trials started around that time and I felt that to be close to Al-Mighty is the only way to get my help and answers for all of it. 

It all started with... 

1) Losing a job

2) Taking care of elderly folk.

3) Looking for a job

4) Financially struggled... to be continue

Those are the topics of my blog that I wanted to share in my following posts. Hopefully its a guide for younger generations that for them to prepare and what sort of experience or skill they required for them to survived when they reach 40... May not apply to all, but perhaps, my sharing of experience will eventually help some people prepare for it.